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Christmas, Dancing and Yoga

Thanksgiving is over and the Christmas season is on the way. I hope your holiday was exactly what you wanted it to be. Our family had a typical “our crazy lives” Thanksgiving. Now that it is over we can get ready for Christmas.

Most of the Christmas thing; I enjoy. I don’t even mind the shopping. Elaine is a great shopper and I am a good helper. I take my job seriously. I’m right there helping Elaine with comments like, “Are you done shopping yet? You are running out of time!” Elaine usually responds by telling me, ”You know, you could help!” That surprises me, I watch the calendar and keep her informed of the date. That’s important, too. Ivy (angrily) reminded me, that I am known for shopping myself on Christmas Eve. One should not rush to lessen the chances of making a mistake.

I do have Christmas responsibilities that I don’t enjoy. Attending Elaine’s engineering Christmas party is something I dread. I made Elaine a promise about 35 years ago that she holds me to at that (construction language) Christmas party. I apologize for using (construction language) and Christmas in the same sentence. The promise is- I take Elaine dancing.

One of Elaine’s great loves is/was dancing. When Elaine hears an up-tempo Bob Seger song on the car radio, the only thing that stops her are those (construction language) seatbelt laws. (Oops, got a little political.) Elaine is quite good at dancing. She is/was extremely flexible and has incredible rhythm. Me? Not so much.

Somewhere around 35 years ago, for the good of our marriage, I promised to take Elaine dancing once a year, every year. Elaine reminds me of that promise at her office Christmas party.

I have come to my fear/hatred of dancing from life’s experience. Elaine talked me into taking her dancing many years ago. I took her to a place frequented by young people (like us) called the Red Garter. The band was loud, the music was fast, I thought to myself, ”OK, let’s get this over with.”,

I took Elaine out on the crowded dance floor. Did I say crowded? I meant CROWDED. I was using my best dance moves (STOP LAUGHING, this is painful for me.) Elaine found her groove. After a few seconds, (seemed like hours) the crowd opened up a little and Elaine’s dance moves carried her back away from me. As quickly as that happened, the gap in the crowd closed. Elaine was now ten feet from me, with twenty other dancers between us. I looked around; I was dancing with the backs of three guys. I couldn’t get to Elaine. Truthfully, she was dancing and didn’t even notice I was gone. Ever the fast thinker, I realized she didn’t need me. I dropped my head and boogied/ran/snuck off the dance floor. I went back to the table and sat down.

After the song was over, Elaine met me back at the table. She asked, “Where did you go?” I replied, “I was going to ask you the same thing.”

That was the end of my dancing career. However, I love her and agreed to do a least one slow dance with her every year. I figured if I was hanging on to her, I would never need to sneak off the dance floor again.

Elaine’s Christmas party is next Saturday.

So………Imagine my delight!

A couple nights ago I walked into our bedroom. Elaine was lying on her back on the bed. She had one leg flat on the bed and the other leg was pointing at the ceiling. I asked her, “What are you doing?” Calmly, she replied, “I’m stretching, watch this!’ She took her vertical leg and pulled it down. She put her heel on her forehead. Then she switched legs and did it with the other leg. (I’m not kidding.)

Impressed, (but I couldn’t bring myself to show it) I told her, “great, I can do that! You need to stop that before you hurt yourself.” I left the bedroom before she asked me to show her I could (or not) do that also.

When the twins came into our bedroom to wish Grandma a “good night”, Elaine was still stretching. The twins were fascinated and saw a chance for competition. They jumped on the bed and started stretching with Grandma.

I could hear Grandma and the twins giggling This went on for a good half hour. The twins wished Grandma a “good night” and went to bed. Things were great the next day, however Elaine informed me her back was a little sore. As the day went on her back went from a little sore to REALLY sore.

The next day, Elaine could barely move. I suggested she make an appointment at the doctor. She declined. Secretly, I was thinking this might get me out of dancing.

Much to my dismay, Elaine has fully recovered with plenty of time to attend the Christmas party. Luckily, I have another week to get the twins to get Grandma to stretch with them. Don’t tell Elaine!

Our crazy lives!

Monner

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